Today is Thursday which means it’s time for me to hate-watch the latest episode of And Just Like That, the horrendous Sex And The City reboot. Much like a horrible car crash, you want to look away but you just can’t help but watch. Each week, HBO Max inflicts more trauma on my soul with the latest episode that sets fire to the legacy of one of my all-time favorite TV series.
In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, “I couldn’t help but wonder” what the writers behind the reboot were smoking when they came up with this stuff. Here’s a list of what I consider to be some of the show’s worst offenses…
- The cast are in their 50s but portrayed as if they’re in their 80’s. There is nothing I’d love more than to sit down with the writer behind the “Steve’s storyline is he has a hearing aid and screams WHAT?! throughout every scene he’s in” idea, look them in the eye, and ask them what in the world is wrong with them. Similarly, as the world heads into year 3 of a pandemic, we did not need to see Carrie hobbling on a cane up her 3-story walk up and later get hip surgery. The last thing the world needs is more bleak content, and let’s just say the entire Carrie hip episode was as bleak as it gets. These people are in their 50’s; Andy Cohen is 52 and has a 2 year old, produces approximately 75+ TV shows, and gets hammered every New Year’s Eve on live TV for our enjoyment. Yet in the SATC universe, 50 year old’s are deaf, out of touch, ignorant and in need of new hips. The whole point of the original series is that women can find love and live their best lives in their 30’s and 40’s and beyond. Yet somehow, the reboot has me expecting that the season finale will be them all applying for residency at a nursing home.
- The Samantha disrespect. Yes, we all know that Kim Cattrall didn’t want to participate in the reboot (smart decision, clearly). But there’s no excuse for the disrespect the reboot has inflicted on Samantha Jones’ legacy. For 6 seasons and 2 movies, Samantha was the wealthiest and most successful of the foursome – yet we’re supposed to believe she dropped Carrie because she ‘fired’ her? From the pro bono PR Samantha had been doing as a favor in the midst of her thriving career? Ok Carrie. Friendly reminder Samantha was the first to offer to loan you $40k when you were homeless because you spent all your money on shoes. #JusticeForSamantha
- Everything about Miranda. Let me take you on a journey to the past; 15 years ago when the first SATC movie came out. After 6 seasons of Steve proving to be the most supportive and committed partner, he had an incredibly out of character affair. However, the movie showcased Miranda and Steve working through his betrayal resulting in a truly iconic and beautiful reunion on the Brooklyn Bridge. Fast forward to the reboot and we should forget any of that ever happened much like Miranda apparently has. I won’t bring up the unspeakable event in Carrie’s kitchen, but needless to say the Miranda we all once knew and loved would NEVER. She loves Steve. Steve loves her. Who the hell is going to tell her she has foam on her lip? Not Che Diaz. Nearly as offensive as her sudden amnesia about her love for her husband is her amnesia about her love of technology. The woman who had panic attacks on both her honeymoon and Carrie’s (failed) honeymoon because she didn’t have access to wifi now suddenly doesn’t know what a podcast is? The only conclusion that would make any of this make sense is that Miranda has actually been possessed by aliens all season.
- The forced wokeness. As much as I love the original series, there is no doubt that in hindsight the show was tone deaf at best on countless social issues and the lack of diversity is glaring given the melting pot that is NYC. While I appreciate the reboot for trying to rectify this issue, the approach of shoving as many woke moments into a single scene every episode every week is a misstep to say the least. First of all, these are lifelong New Yorkers. Pigs would fly and hell would freeze over before a Harvard educated, powerhouse career woman like Miranda would make a complete 180 into a Karen. Carrie may be a complete narcissist with horrible taste in men, but it makes no sense that she’d spend 4+ decades in NYC and somehow never heard of Diwali or met a South Asian woman before. I’m too exhausted to even touch on the mishandling of Rose’s gender identity storyline; all I can say is that if the reboot ruins Harry next, I’m burning HBO to the ground.
- Big’s Death. Don’t get me wrong, I have been a member of the “Big is Trash Club” since he up and left Carrie for Paris and came back with a 25 year old fiancé in season 2. And in light of the allegations against Chris Noth, I think we can all agree that Big’s departure is for the best. However, after 6 seasons of watching and tolerating the most toxic relationship in TV history, not to mention a movie where he LEFT CARRIE AT THE ALTER and a second movie where he wanted to take 2 days a week off of their marriage – we went through all of that, to watch the man die on a Peloton? Talk about getting ZERO return on investment.
